1988
Sport: Action
£7.99
£2.99
English
ZX Spectrum 48K/128K
Multiple schemes (see individual downloads)

54
Jonathan Davies
Chris Bourne

This doesn't really fit into any regular footie category. It's one of those dreadful joystick wagglers, I'm afraid. (Remember those? They were quite popular for an unfeasable length of time. Basically you had to, um, 'waggle' your joystick back and forth until a) your hand hurt; b) the joystick broke; or c) you finished the event. Brilliant!) However, some may consider it a welcome break from all those lists and little men running about, so let's take a look.

There are millions of 'events' to plod through, all of which have to be played in a certain order. There are all sorts of things, ranging from Monkey Bars, through Squat Thrusts (yikes!) to Jonglerie Avec Balle (but only in the French version). Played individually they'd all be mildly crap, but taken as a whole they're, um, unbelievably crap. This sort of rubbish went out with Daley Thompson.

It's a pretty slick piece of work (the graphics are okay, and there's actually some music for a change) but this is hardly a proper footie game. And the poor bloke you control looks more like Clare Rayner than any footballer I've ever seen.

83%
47%
58%
45%
52%

Screenshot Text

Lumme, you'd never catch me doing this! Buy that man a lager and a packet of pork scratchings!