WADDA YA MEAN, I'VE GOT A BIG NOSE?! (WOTTA WHOPPA! - ED.) I THINK IT'S QUITE PRIM AND PROPER AND ONLY A LITTLE BIT RED FROM THE ICY WINDS. OH, IT'S A GAME! SILLY ME, NICK ROBERTS, THE RESIDENT CRASH RUDOLF, INVESTIGATES THE PERSON ON THE END OF THE CONK.
It was a lovely day in prehistoric Ludlow. People were bustling about their day-to-day business and the one-way system was causing havoc, as usual. Big Nose the caveman decided to take the sabre-toothed tiger for a walk so he put on his best pair of skins and set off. Little did he know he might never see his cave again.
Just as he got to the corner of his mud track there was a flash of bright light and SHAZAM!, he was being whisked through time. These time tunnels are strange things. They appear from nowhere, suck in a couple of bods, mess about with the space-time matrix then trundle off again - the bleeders!
The next thing Big Nose knew he was in a strange new world, surrounded by horrible smells, nasty people and strange machines. Could this be the toilet down the local pub? Nope, it's present day America. How will Big Nose survive and what's he been brought here for?
It soon becomes clear. Armed with a handful of rocks, Big Nose has to free his animal chums, who've been sucked through time with him. They're locked up in cages and the natives in this new world do their best to stop B Nose Esq rescuing them.
LORD OF THE JUNGLE?
Big Nose is the follow up to Taman Goes Ape and gameplay is very similar. The big difference is that the scrolling play area is now much bigger. All the backgrounds and sprites have an abundance of colour and there's no horrible clash to contend with.
You need a very steady hand to survive on the slim ledges dotted around each level. One false move and Big Nose plummets to the ground and back to the beginning - very annoying.
Big Nose's American Adventure is an excellent budget game but it's a little lacking in the lastability stakes. It's extremely annoying when you get to the second animal and can't cope with the hundreds of nasties thrown at you. (That's probably 'cos Nick's crap -Ed)
If you're looking for a cheap, fun game with attractive cartoon graphics, you've found it. But don't expect to be playing this to long sessions because If you do you just might end up in the loony bin (so what's new?! -Ed)!
NICK ... 76%
'Why’s he called Big Nose I don’t know – looks more like a fat Tarzan to me. The beer belly’s probably due to all the ale he quaffs on his travels, which gets him so legless he goes the opposite way you’re trying to guide him. Once you've mastered the sensitive controls you bound round the platforms and zap the baddies at a tremendous pace. There’s plenty of variety and surprises in the graphics and gameplay. Big Nose possesses that old Manic Miner-style addiction, forcing you to have just one more go at reaching the next stage. A notch above your average platform game with plenty of original features, this is a right bargain.'
LUCY ... 80%
Codemasters nose what they're doin' when it comes to jolly platform games.
THE BIG NOSE BRIGADE
1. Barry Manilow: Singer-songwriter extraordinaire.2. Wozza Lapworth: Prod Ed and part-time pot holer.3. Barbara Streisand: Actress/singer (sort of).4. Mr Nosey: Small green blob, star of kids TV.5. Pinocchio: Wooden puppet with no strings.6. Steve Martin: Comedy actor and star of Roxanne.7. Mark Caswell: No, that's his spare he keeps in the drawer with his Jaffa cakes!8. Dumbo: Elephant start of a Walt Disney cartoon.9. Noseybonk: Spooky pratt out of that classic program, Jigsaw.10. Mr Punch: Policeman murderer and child basher.
Who's that with the conk the size of a jumbo jet?
Ouch! Barbecued Big Nose.
Anyone for a coconut milk shake?