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Alan Steel
Strategy: War
ZX Spectrum 48K

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Lesley Quigg
Chris Bourne

Stand by all you sim fans, you're about to meet your maker. Personally, I despised simulations, but then I'm a girlie. Girls are supposed to like dolls and ballet dancing, not macho sims.

Of course, you all know exactly what the Bismarck was, don't you? No? Oh dear, you really shouldn't have skived off all those history lessons. Well, just for the record (and those empty pages in your history jotters), the Bismarck was a wonderful ship built by the Germans during World War Two. The Germans claimed the Bismarck was unsinkable which meant that the all had very red faces when she finally met the wonderful British Navy and was gloriously sunk. Hurrah! And who said YS wasn't educational? (Erm, nobody actually. Ed)

Before you toddle off to impress your friends with your new-found intelligence you're going to have to either play the game. You can either take the British side and sink that darn ship, or get all Germanic (boo!) and try to save that darn ship and so rewrite history. Either way, you'll find that the Bismarck nearly always sinks, so she couldn't have been that commendable.

THere's no great complexity to Bismarck; just tonnes of strategy, loads of time-wasting and a helluva lot of fire extiguishers which you have to use to save your blazing ship. The gameplay is nothing special and it's highly likely that you've seen it all before. This really is a yawnsome game, so try not to hit your held on poor old Spec. Take the Keep Britain Tidy campaing approach - it doesn't take a minute to bag it and bin it.


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Hello Bill. My name is Alicia and I saw your advertisement in last month's issue. You sound an interesting kind of guy. Can we meet?

"See here squire, I can do you a nice little deal on the battleship. Sixteen-inch armour plate, forty-four cannon and part-exchange for a Morris Marina. How about it?"