Roger: An extraterrestial Barbara Woodhouse would not be amused by attempts to destroy the Irish half-dozen of 'At-At Walkers' going walkies across this game's continuously scrolling screen, and neither am I.
Really, putting the poor pets to sleep with allegedly lethal laser cannon may be pathetically easy but I'm sure a gentle wallop across the nose with a rolled-up newspaper would suffice.
At least the 'Walkers' only drop 'Smart Bombs' and growl out 'Laser Bolts' in reply, which is better than leaving a mess on the pavement for a chap to step in...
What can I say? This dreadful load of sub-Starwars shootiebangs demands an attention span of just a little under ten minutes. That's how long it takes to get good at it, get tired of it and start wondering why anybody should want to buy it. You can pass the interludes between woofers by collecting 'rebel soldiers' from the planet surface but I really can't imagine why anyone would want to bother. 0/5 MISS
Dave: Ask your grandad about this one. It's so old and 'orrible you keep playing to see if it gets any worse. 1/5 MISS
Ross: Right back to the Dark Ages with this one - it's an old Atari VCS game and it shows.
The mechanical elephants are well drawn but hardly flicker-free. Pretty boring stuff. 1/5 MISS